Although the temptation didn’t disappear and the struggle didn’t dissolve, since asking Jesus for his mercy for this sin in Reconciliation, I have found an inexplicable strength in overcoming this sin — a strength that is not my own.
Jesus has given me His strength to fight this temptation, not because I don’t want to be separated from Him, but because He doesn’t want to be separated from me.
It never made me feel better — rather, it would make me feel dirty, empty, and full of regret.
As I grew older and learned more about this sin, I heard many times that it was something that boys struggled with, but found myself believing it wasn’t really a girl thing.
God’s grace isn’t confined to the sacraments, but the surety of the grace He pours out in the sacraments is an extremely important to seek out when seeking to live virtuously.
Gradually, I began to understand that, if I wanted a true relationship with our Lord and if I wanted to overcome this sin, I was going to have to ask for His help and receive His grace in the Sacrament of Reconciliation.
It’s not easy to admit to masturbation to priests in Confession; it is not easy to name this sin; it was not easy to estimate the amount of times I’d committed it.
I can’t tell you exactly why I started, but as a young teenage girl, I found myself habitually masturbating.
Before I fully even understood what I was doing, I sensed instinctively that what I was doing was not right.